Yesterday was 08/08, the Lionsgate Portal day, when the brightest star in our sky, Sirius, aligns with the Sun and Earth. I always find it a potent day. As it’s in August, it’s linked to the Leo constellation, and therefore carries themes of visibility, courage, personal power and leadership; what I would call more masculine, radiant energies. Yet this year the Lionsgate Portal pretty much coincided with the full moon, which carries what I would describe as more feminine, reflective, inward energies. So, an interesting mix of yin and yang, solar and lunar, which I truly am feeling during these days.
Traditionally, I would ‘do’ something for Lionsgate Portal, like join a prayer circle or sharing, and my attitude would tend to be more aligned with its yang energy. However this year the day felt spacious and open, and I wasn’t called to do anything in particular at all. Instead, I found myself in a very reflective mood, feeling the full moon filtering its introspective rays through my inner waters. I also felt a curious aloneness during the day, whether I was with others or not. It wasn’t quite loneliness; there was a tenderness and a delicacy to it, but there was also a gentle power. It wasn’t the usual kind of visible, outward power I would associate with Lionsgate Portal and Leo energy. It was inward, invisible, intangible, in-the-background. A subtle felt-sense of being self-resourced at a very deep level.
The morning was spent with three incredible, gorgeous young women, each one a shining light of feminine power in their own unique, heart-based, gentle way. It felt like a privilege to be sharing this time. Together we cleared the flow of water from our water mine, where it enters a holding pool. This pool is an ancient, stone-lined, teardrop-shaped pool with steep stone steps winding around the inner wall to access the water. I like to think how many feet have walked those steps in times gone by, as past inhabitants came to collect their precious rock-filtered drinking water. And we are linked to those people by the same constant, unbroken, unending flow of water direct from the Earth.
Then the afternoon was spent mostly alone, doing the usual daily land chores. Occasionally I met with Trev for a dip in the pool or to cook together or share a drink, and often I stopped for cuddles with the animals. But, mostly, it was just a normal, ‘mundane’ day, with mostly myself and the land for company. Occasionally, my inner-critic would challenge me on this, wanting to make me feel bad for not doing anything ‘powerful’ on this special day of personal power. But, gradually, this voice faded, having had its space, and beyond it was a peace. A self-reflective, borderline melancholic peace, but a peace nevertheless. The peace of understanding that this is my path, my home, my life, my commitment, and that it is soul-aligned. It might not be ‘out there’ and visible in a big way, it might be very simple and humble. But it’s my soul-truth and it’s enough. Through this understanding comes the peace of trust and faith.
Power isn’t always visible. Leadership isn’t always what we think it is. As feminine energy rises once more on our planet, for crucial balance, it might be time to expand our understandings of these things. Yes, there is a time and a place for overt shows of power and leadership. But it isn’t the whole story. Power is also in the tended spaces that hold the leaders, in the stewardship of land and people, in the peace of surrender and trust, in the blissful aloneness of a soul journey, in continuity of care, in the mundane, in-the-background, daily chores of nurture, in the choice to commit and show up day after day, in prayers, in unerring faith.
Doing the inner work to create strength and resolve as a deep internal resource is power. The gentleness of a kind heart, cranked open despite and because of countless bruises and batterings is power. Choosing love and forgiveness is power. Finding peace is power.
The full moon helped to show me a different side of power this weekend. We are both solar and lunar, radiant and magnetic, visible and hidden. But perhaps, for now, the more shadowy, lunar aspect of power is needing our attention and appreciation. A softening around the edges, a gentleness, a collapse in hierarchy, a mutual honouring of both sides of us. I honour all those in-the-background leaders, holding and tending the space, making prayers, healing and nurturing the visible ones, following their soul-calling no matter what, embodying humility and wisdom. You are my way-showers today, visible in your invisibility.
frond yoga with Rebecca May 